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  • Juanita Molano Parra

2 Mistakes to Avoid "Expecting"

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We constantly hear about disappointment, about too high expectations, but we rarely understand them, let alone use them intentionally.

Disappointment is the emotion that occurs when what we expect (aka expectations) doesn’t happen in reality.

Expectations can uplift or can sabotage. They can be positive, negative or extreme. They can be anything we make them, which is why it’s less about the expectations themselves, and more about what we do with them.

This week, I offer you 3 things to avoid when it comes to setting expectations for the future.

1. Unspoken expectations

As you know, things can quickly go awry in a partnership – business or personal – when you expect something to happen or be done, but you’re not upfront about it.

Unspoken expectations from the start can turn into grudges, resentment and imbalance almost immediately. Be upfront and clear with your partners and employees about your …

  • Goals

  • Challenges

  • Desires

  • Values

2. Unrealistic expectations

I am all about dreaming big. So, I don’t want unrealistic to deter you. But those expectations you know are unattainable and will set you up for failure. Here’s an example: I’m not a runner and can’t run more than a few minutes. A big dream would be to run a 10K by the end of the summer. An unrealistic expectation is that I will run a 10K by May 1st.

Just like unspoken expectations, unrealistic expectations too can be a detriment to your relationships and business. Knowing your Self – skills, passions, capacity, resiliency – can help you set expectations that balance 1) what you can accomplish with 2) what’s necessary to grow.

Expectations aren’t good or bad, they just are. You shouldn't treat them as taboo or avoid them entirely as a way to avoid disappointment. Spoiler alert, that doesn’t actually work.

At the beginning of your next project, a new relationship or fresh week, set your expectations upfront with someone you trust, and check 1) that you are being upfront and clear about what you want, and 2) that it’s not magical thinking.

Ready. Set. Go! (And don’t forget to come back to this email and tell me what you thought.)

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